A world ruled by horny ducks.

I am currently waging a war on hormones.

The things that make me go crazy one moment and giggling like a maniac the next.

The things that make you love and hate.

The things that are suppose to make my period come!

Anyways, I'm not particular fond of hormones right now so I've devised an ingenious plan of getting rid of them!

I am going to make a hormone sucking bazooka and after I've sucked all the hormones out of my unfortunate and very unwilling victims, I am going to dehydrate all the hormones so they'll turn into powder. hiak hiak! and guess what?

I'm going to feed the powder form of hormones to the ducks!

The ducks will become the new generation of human beings cause they're cooler than monkeys, while we will be incapable of any emotions. NO MORE WARS! NO MORE HATE! and best of all NO MORE GEORGE BUSH!

But then again, they'll be no more joy, no more orgasms, no more love.

Ah well, we can sure live without all those! HAIL TO THE HORNY DUCKS!

O happy days, o happy days. C'mon, everybody, sing along with me!

O happy days~~ O happy days!! ~~~

The Lisa is extremely happy today and the reason being today is Ken and Lisa's ONE YEAR'S ANNIVERSARY~

YEAH BABY! You got that right! One whole freaking year.

The longest relationship I've ever been in and its still going strong. [ My shortest relationship is one week ] YES! Feel free to envy me, hon. You can throw all your insults to my face but the fact remains! YOU CANNOT ESCAPE THE TRUTH that you're a lonely bitch and i'm the engaged bitch.

* grins * Just like the fact remains that I'm a highly ambitious money-driven whore and a damn hot one at that.

Yeah yeah! Life can't be any sweeter. Wait, let me rephrase that. ---> Life can't be any sweeter unless I suddenly become a multi billionairess ^^ yeah that sounds better.

But for now, I'll just drown myself in the love river, convincing myself that, love is everything and it can also put five star restaurant's standard food into my delicate acid-filled stomach.

* sigh *... I can just imagine it now. Me, Ken and Baby Boo. Oh yes, did I ever mention that we're gonna name our baby daughter Boo? As in B-O-O. Don't you laugh at it. When you get yourself a daughter you can give it a boring name like anna or racheal, but we're talking about MY BABY, so BOO it is.

Ain't love just great? * melts * everything just seem so... brighter!~ and cheery!~ * giggles girlishly *

* snaps back to reality * AHH!~ English assignment. FUCK FUCK FUCK. Oh, when will my sword brandishing prince come and rescue me from the evil clutches of English?

YOU are nothing but an attention-seeking bitch. Just because you don't have much friends doesn't give you the right to bitch about me.

Hey, I work hard to make new friends and even harder to try and keep them. How about you? I will not consider being sarcastic as a nice thing to do to your friends.

And what about those evil mood swings? You better keep them under control if you don't want to lose any more " friends ". If you want to make friends, you gotta be a friend first.

Lashing out on people for having different opinions from you is hardly a way to make friends. And oh oh! what about your violent outburst? Don't forget about your trademark, being a bitch to your best friend?

I am not yours. I don't belong to anybody for I am a free spirit. [ you can't get cheesier than that ]

Just stop and think, why do I cringe at the thought of hanging out with you? Could it be that I don't want to be victimised by your sarcasm? Or live in fear of your next mood swings? Sure, you're sweet and all, but seriously, you can be a total bitch without even knowing it.

How can you classify me as a person who doesn't know anything beyond socialising/ " networking ". You don't have to hate the world just cause its not nice to you. Have you ever wonder if you're nice to the world?

We're individuals so why should we all try and be like you? We don't want to be clones of a clones of a clones. You don't want us to agree with everything you say, yet, you challege our perspective. Girl, you can't get more contradictory than that.

What comes around goes around. You bitch about me, I'll make sure my inner bitch will win over you. I am not fake or superficial. I'm far beyond that. I have a brain I intend to use. Why don't you use yours instead of bitching about things eh?

Greeting from The Lisa. yes, The Lisa is feeling very greetacious today.

Anyways, I've been extra busy last week. Diary was crammed full of appointments and " things that needed to be done NOW ". Ran out of space so had to use post it notes, except my one was cuter than the normal ones.

Last Monday was the craziest... Things kept on happening before I had anytime to rest. Gah, I have to stop networking this much.

Oh yeah, my parents had arrived.!! ~ CLEAN HOUSE! FREE DRIVERS! FOOD! and CLEAN CLOTHES THAT CAN MAGICALLY APPEAR IN MY ROOM! Booyah, I couldnt believe that I was actually happy about them being here but obviously, the [ ahem ] hardships of last year really did it. Now I can totally concentrate on acing all my external assessments and wow everyone with my genius brain.!

On Monday [ this Monday ] I wore my new gray contact lenses to school, and damn, it was annoying. I couldnt walk five paces without banging into someone or something but it was well worth it. My favourite person in the whole world told me he likes my eyes and that they're hardout pretty. !! ^^ I couldnt stop grinning like the stylish idiot I am the whole day. Among those comments, I've also got :: Hey you look mixed. As in half Asian and half Caucasian. EXACTLY the look I was hoping for. My dear sister said :: Congrats, you have finally mutated. ><

That actually got me thinking. What is beauty? Isn't it different for everyone since " beauty is in the eye of the beholder " ? But, there's always someone who would make everyone go :: yeah I agree shes pretty. And what about those pretty girls who are biatches? Would you still consider them pretty if all they ever let out are string of ugly swears words? A fuck in every second word of the sentences?

My mum once told me that beauty is from within, its what feeling you give people, kinda like our inner radiation. My friends tell me that I'm the most beautiful when I'm having fun and laughing. So yes, lisa, laugh more.

There are still times when I wish that I'm prettier though. It's natural, especially with all the magazines bombarding you with flawless looking models, tips on how to have pouty lips, what kind of face guys would find attracted to and how to maximise your inner flirt. It's like all of them are trying to fit you into this specific type of mould and if you don't fit, you're not consider as pretty. All I can say to that is :: fucking bullshit.

You're yourself. Instead of moaning about how you wish you can change something about yourself, try to focus on living your life. Cause, if you aint busy living, you're busy dying. I'm not becoming some preachy kinda chick... of course I want longer hair, smaller face, bigger eyes, longer eyes and etc etc, but unless some rich guy come along and sweep me off my feet with his multi million dollar accounts or my dad becomes a plastic surgerer, then my chance of ever changing my looks are really really slim.

But thank god, I AM PRETTY. I've heard it often enough. I still have my doubts but hey who could argue with the masses of people. * winks * Lol, I feel intimidated when people tell me that there are some girls who are a bit [ only a bit, mind you ] prettier than me. Being the gracious person I am, I will always smile at them sweetly and said :: Lucky girl. While secretly thinking to myself :: fuck you fuck you. I alone am the prettiest. I'm gonna gauge your useless eyes out, freak.

Hehe, I can imagine it now. Me gauging someone's eyes out. Shouldnt be any different with the cow's eye I dissected during my biology class. This is not called vainess, rather, it is called self confidence. I am pretty. Tell that to yourself thousand of times over and over again and soon you'll even start to believe it. [ hopefully ]

Well, I've gotta go play with my make up now to get ready for Friday's auditions. Keke, so much for beauty comes from within eh...

Ken's Birthday

Okay, folks, here you go. A nice little treat. Yesterday [ 10.03.06 ] was Ken's 19th Birthday..

And because I'm his girlfriend, I have to do something for him rather than just chuck him so lame-o present and say :: happy birthday, kiddo! SO...lets start..

People involved ::

Huei - the designer and artist of the poster

Grace - rookie cake-maker

Jim and Leo - driver, present buyer and the " thieves "

The Process Of Making The Poster

At first, we wanted to use a paper that is 30 pieces of A4 stuck together but being the genius we are, we figured out that Bigger Paper = More Work

So we decided to use 9 pieces of A3 papers instead. Now OBSERVE, this was what it started out as, just 9 pieces of boring white papers.

Ahh, polka dots. Who can resist them? They're so cute and energetic.

Completion of polka dots. ^^

Aww, isn't she just sweet. :P After doing the circles, we cut out some black squares to use as borders. Something about " contrast " and " absence in the presence ".

Ta-da! Ze Borders!

After playing a game of " who's polka dot is bigger ", we've finally completed the background of the poster. All this took about 2 hours, could be less if we didnt waste so much time on bullshitting. Lol.

And voila!~ The finished version of the poster. I really love it. I think its pretty good since we did it in 3 hours. Wahaha, we turned boring papers to a poster that everyone would envy ^^

The Process Of Making The Cake

Butter and castor sugar. We had to cream it until its light and fluffy and because I dont like using machines, we use our arm power.

This cake is highly nutritious because normally you'll just have to put one or two eggs in a cake, but i've put four! [ it told me to in the recipe ] you'll have to put the eggs in one at a time or else it wouldnt work. Err, dont be put off my the third picture, I know it looks really disgusting now but soon, my dears, soon it will flourish!

Then, we divided the flour and milo syrup into three nearly equal parts and stir one part at a time to the egg, butter and castor sugar mixture.

Miam miam, chocolatey cake syrup.

Pours, pouring and poured. The cake syrup is finally in the cake tin. Mission accomplished.

The cake is now in the oven. Oh yeah, I'm wearing my uniform...

Mmm, nice cake. Grace and I ate the crust off at the top cause thats the best part, it doesnt matter since we're gonna turn it upside down and cover it with icing.

Pure white icing sugar... then the innocence being taken away by the evil cocoa powder.

Damn, dont I look professional with the swish of my spoon.

The white stuff on top was melted chocolate. We regretted putting it on cause it looked so much better without it.

The Presents

1. Cake
2. Poster
3. Shaving Gel
4. Face Moisturiser
5. Condom Box Filled With Chocolate [ as a joke ]
6. Shotglasses Game
7. Alcohol Stainless Steel Flask
8. Fishbone Keyring
9. Skateboard Keyring
10. A Pair Of Cute Skull Earrings
11. Apple Juice
12. Heart Basket Filled With Chocolate Covered Coffee Beans
13. Heart Basket Filled With Chocolate Covered Raisins
14. Heart Basket Filled With Chocolate Covered Peanuts
15. Heart Basket Filled With Chocolate Covered Almonds
16. A Shirt That Says :: if no one wants to play with you, play with yourself.
17. A Grey T-shirt
18. A Magazine
19. A Photo Of Myself When I Was 3-4

So yes, 19 presents in total. It was really really hard trying to think up 19 presents if you have a budget. But its all good.

On Thursday 11:45pm, Jim and Leo came to pick me up so we could go to Ken's house to hang up the poster. Those guys were super damn sweet! They braved through the bush that was in front of Ken's bedroom window, jsut cause I'm a chick.

They nearly got butchered by Ken though cause he thought we were thieves. Yeah, we weren't really that discreet. It didnt really help when the whole family was still up.

When he opened his window, we were all stunned. Plan totally ruined, so we just asked him to come out to blow out his cake. We used sparkly fireworks instead of the normal candles cause I forgot to buy them. We even did a countdown :: 3-2-1 HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!

Asked him how he feels now that hes 19 and his genius reply :: Cold, I'm still in my PJs.

Lol...Feel less stress now that is all over...

Grow your own brain

I'm dead serious when I asked you to piss off and do it yourself.

I dont like it when somebody is constantly looking over your shoulder, trying to copy my answers or asking me if its right when the bloody answer is right there in front of you!

DUDE, all you have to do is read the paragraph and choose " true " or " false "! How hard is that? GROW A FREAKING BRAIN! I didnt become smart overnight, you know, I have to work hard on it to get where I am now, so why dont you do the same?

As for the girl who used to sit beside me, I have one very good advice for you :: LISTEN IN CLASS. Instead of complaining how sore your ear is or listening to gossip, it wouldnt hurt one bit if you listen to what we have to do in class. I'm not a very happy person when you INSIST on copying my answers and TAKING THE CREDITS for it, like you did it all yourself. Bullshit.

I'm sick of people taking advantage of me. Never ever mess with me when I'm being an ambitious bitch. Maybe if you work as hard as me, you'll be smarter but there's no gurantee.

FUCK YOU! I'm trying to learn in school so dont annoy me when I'm trying to do my work! THAT MEANS YOU, DEVON! Stop poking me in English, stop talking to me when I'm trying to finish my homework in Maths, stop asking me about MP3s in Accounting and stop whatever you're doing.

You might not want to get all your credits, but I do. My very own life depends on the end of the year's results! Screw this up for me and you're dead. Just don't come near me when I'm either :: doing my work or have the " I dont give a shit " look on my face.

Yes, call me a bitch or whatever, but I'm allowed to have my bad days as well and this is just my way of venting it out. So just get this straight ::

MY EFFORT = MY CREDITS
[ not his, not hers, not he-shes BUT MINE ]

gah, the stupid rain woke me up again. not very happy about this since i really needed this recuperation time. [ i have a cold * sniff sniff cough cough * ]

ever since i was small, the rain and i, we had a love-hate relationship. in malaysia, during the monsoon seasons which rained almost everyday, i would get out my little green frog umbrella and fly away to dance in the rain. everything was simple then, just kindy, eating, sleeping and tv. you could say i wasn't a very productive kid back then.

but now, i wish it wouldnt rain so much. apart from being cold and sick, i have to deal with " lonely " as well. cold and sick i can stand cause i know it wouldnt last if i just stay in duvet with a warm cup of milo but lonely.. i'm not quite sure about that. the rain, it seems to me, just intesifies the loneliness inside of me. thats why, i dont like to be alone, i would always try to find someone to call on the phone, but most of the time, i would just sit in the corner, clutching the phone in my hand and ask myself :: who really cares?

who really cares that im feeling lonely and unattractive at the moment? who cares that i screwed up my maths test? who cares that my cat is choking on a piece of furniture? .... yeah, who cares?

its extremely tempting to call my mum and tell her i wanna go back to m'sia this year.. extremely.. but dammit, i need to complete year 11 first. by then, i dont think i wanna go anymore..

its a bad bad thing to live your life in the past. holding on to something you shouldnt be holding on to just because a memory reminds you of the " good times " together. sure, we still have good times, but things have change... people have change... including me...

its times like these that make me really miss my parents. the only people in the world who would bring me out at 4am in the morning for breakfast cause i was too hungry to sleep or let me buy anything i want within good reasons and behaviours.

i began to see myself doing little things that my mum or dad would do, like insisting on ken making porridge for me when im sick [ cause thats what my mum would have done ] or making red eggs for birthdays... it just makes me feel better...familiarity is always a good thing...

i miss mum and dad, william and alex, michelle and jin, the stinky two turtles, beautiful piano, astro and curry maggie mee and crazy texting...

it truly sucks...